To begin with, I am not a native English speaker, I just write my mind.

It's my 10th day since my first genuine attempt on digital drawing, dreaming suicide, on 17/03/16. Only the digital drawings are new, the traditional media ones are my school work. I posted to make my gallery look fuller. I always had a probia to new on electronic drawing pad, because it's too 'slippery' the touch of the pen tip and the pad surface. I prepared to overcome my phobia by watching Jazza's how to draw videos, then I realised that it doesn't matter how many videos you watch, or even how many photos you mimick. The only way to learn is not even from the hands. It's the painful process of extracting the visual memories from your unintentional absortion of the physical world. The process is not easier by drawing cute figures. What is pleasing to the viewers is always a struggle of the drawer. I avoid using the word 'artist'. How dare would I call myself an artist? I have no plans ahead. I just have that dire will of quickly producing one drawing per day. I want to correctly acknowledge myself how much so far I have known about the world. What kind of image is on my mind? Where is the boundry of my knowledge? To what extent I feel pain in my head drawing something new. I have to admit that my brain processes really better with forms. Before people call it talent (and I think talent is an overused word), it's more about the structure of brains belong to a portion of the world proportion. Like someone good at maths, or someone good at language, it's just difference in structure of brains. I want myself so much to be good at programming, but I found that I am uninspired by sequence. Sorry I am more a sensual person. I am drawing because it makes the best use of my brain.

FInally, it's nice to write here rather than on fb, because people accuse you of overbroadcasting of personal life. Here the audience is more converge. It's important for me to find my own crowd, but not the click and add friends.